I listened to Time by Pink Floyd the other day, from their seminal album Dark Side of the Moon. I am a big Floyd fan, but hadn't listened to this album in a while. As a kid, the song meant less to me than now that I am older, married with kids and maybe half way through my career. So the songs theme has been ticking away in the back of my brain for a few weeks. It's a great song, some excerpts below, but really just go listen.
A buddy of mine had posted an older video of his daughter, and he mentioned how he missed his kids when they were that small. That same day I took my daughter on a daddy-daughter date. We went to a mall, took some funny photo booth pics, she played in the play area, and jumped on the bungee cord trampoline thing. then we went to dinner and called it a night. Now the play area was filled with mostly toddlers, and it's really meant for that age. My almost 7 yo girl really wanted to play in there, but I told her "come on, this is for little kids." No matter, she gave me the "but Daaaad" eyes, and I let her play for a while. I sat there and just stared at my girl tower over smaller kids, and be really too big for all the stuff, but she was having a blast. Suddenly it hit me, these days are numbered.
Time is moving so fast with my kids. My daughter seems older than she is, and we tend to forget she's not yet 7. I want to sit and watch her be a little kid as long as I can. I want to play with her while she wants to as much as possible. I want to enjoy every moment of her growing up. I know that one day she'll be a teen, and then one day gone. There are a lot of days between now and then, and I want to focus on each one we have together more closely.
While my daughter was climbing over play sets, with one leg sweep, I laughed and let her be a little kid. When she wanted to take funny pictures, we did. When I showed her the bungee jumping thing, she was a strong "no Dad, that is too scary." I didn't push, she truly looked scared of the whole idea. But, we walked past it a couple times while shopping. Once we were both ready to head out of the mall for dinner, unprovoked, she turns to me and says "Dad, I want to go back do that jumping thing," and I said" are you sure?" to which she replied, "it's a little scary, but I think I can do it." Of course as soon as she was strapped in, she loved it, and wanted to do it again. She told me on the drive home when I asked her why she decided to try the bungee jump "sometimes things look scary at first Dad, but if I see them once or twice, I can be brave enough to try it." Love. This. kid.
Time is ticking away, and you will never seem to have enough. In one hour I saw my daughter want to play on a toddler play set, and also find the courage to decide to try something new and pretty scary for a 6 yo. I couldn't have been more proud of both sides of my daughter. I love seeing her grow, learn, become confident, and still be a little kid. Either way I loved our date. I'll walk with her, holding her hand, for every second I can.
Excerpt from Time, by Pink Floyd.
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
Fritter and waste the hours in an off-hand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun
And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death
Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over, thought I'd something more to say